Calvin Klein: Smells Too Much Like Teen Spirit?

First, we get mysterious sewer odors wafting through NYC, now this olfactory challenge emerges: CKin2u. 

The eager folks at the faded brand, Calvin Klein, are hoping to sniff out a new generation of loyalists with a re-introduction of the CKOne perfume that hit it big way back in the 1990s.

From the New York Times:

"Next month, Calvin Klein Inc. and Coty, its fragrance licensee, will introduce a sequel to CK One for a new generation, the so-called millennials, and in doing so, they will attempt to capture lightning in a bottle for a second time. Calvin Klein, now without its namesake designer, hopes to rejuvenate a fragrance embodying the essence of hip 20-somethings — even at the risk that such a notion is as outdated as a Prince song about partying like it’s 1999."

The CK gambit is nothing short of shameless.  The too-cutely-named product (as if texting shorthand makes it hip) will be packaged in a phallic-shaped rocket bottle cast of iPod-like plastic and will be hawked by BubbleGen actor Kevin Zegers (who played the son of a pre-operative transsexual in “Transamerica”) and model, Freja Beha Erichsen.  The company describes the target demo as "physically bold but emotionally guarded."  Use of computers, evidently, makes them thus.

We can poke fun of the late-to-the-party pandering, but the real fatal flaw: lack of authenticity.  No one of this generation wants to smell like BS. 

CKin2u is another sign that brands and retailers are simply bolloxed up when it comes to figuring out the mindset of the Bubble Generation consumer.  Can it be saved?  Maybe.  But the old suits in the stark white offices won't have a clue what to do.  Key is, do they at least know that much.

Message to the Calvin Klein management:  I invite you to come to Silicon Valley and get a primer on the new consumer before you launch a dud.